I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
