Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
