i jhust puked up my retainher.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Someone signed my nipple.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
