Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize