You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize