Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
