READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
