Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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