Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Randomize
