Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
These tits shall not be calmed
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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