either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
