I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize