two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
