We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
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He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
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That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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