We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize