Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
