with your own penis?
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Randomize