Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I AM VODKA MAN
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
