Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
