I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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