a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
