Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Randomize
