I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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