I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
