After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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