well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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