my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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