I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
