In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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