Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
