dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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