She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize