Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
