it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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