Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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