Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
