I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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