theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
