I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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