sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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