just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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