Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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