His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
