Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
