We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
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