did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
sex in a hospital.. check
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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