Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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