White coat. Heels.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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