Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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