I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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